Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Reasons why I am not an elementary school teacher

I volunteered in Alison's classroom today.  I learned some very valuable lessons.

One: Alison's teacher is awesome and has amazing patience. 

Two: Alison's number one talent, according to her, is the monkey bars.  And let me tell you, she rocks those things.

Three:  I could never be a grade school teacher.  For two reasons.

One: I have horrible handwriting.  Her teacher was spelling out stuff on the board and her writing was flawless every time.  You could actually distinguish one letter from the next.  All of Alison's teachers have had this talent.  They must do a test before you even apply to go to school for this.  They make you write out sentences and if they can understand it, you pass.  If not, they send you to med school.  Where, apparently, it doesn't matter if anyone can read the details of medical reports.  Because those aren't important.

Two: My OCD would flip out.  The kids have folders and pencil cases on their desks and those things are not always lined up straight and even. They put the folders on top of the pencil cases when the pencil cases are obviously much smaller than the folder.  The folder could topple off and fall on the floor when perched precariously like this.  And the items inside the pencil cases are not organized and straightened at all and the papers in the folder stick out because they are not properly inserted.  Sometimes they leave items out on their desk when they are not needed.  It was hard enough getting through a couple hours and not reaching over to fix Alison's desk every ten minutes.  But I made it through.  I feel so much stronger now.

Okay, maybe there's a third reason.  There's no spell check in a classroom.  Spell check agrees with me: stay out of the teaching field. 

1 comment:

KateBryan said...

That's ok..your talents are needed in mars, teaching the little aliens to blend in with the human race.